There are many home educators' support groups around the world, particularly in the USA and UK. These can be a good way of getting to know other families, finding out about local regulations or facilities, and for your children to mix with others of different background. You can find a list of web-sites and mailing lists of several UK support groups, listed mainly by county, at my local groups page. But what do you do if there is no support group locally?
Reasons for wanting a support group
First, think about why you would like to join such a group. Is it because other people seem to gain so much from the support of other home educating families? Because you're feeling isolated? Because you would like support and encouragement as you think about curriculum or other issues? These are all good reasons for wanting a support group.
On the other hand, if you're just feeling that your children 'ought' to be socialising a bit more, or that the children they meet already aren't very pleasant, you're likely to be disappointed. Home educated children may not suffer the peer pressure and other stresses of school, but they are basically normal children: there is no immediate guarantee that your child will mix well with others merely because they don't go to school.
If your children are feeling that they would like some friends, the best starting place is an activity group based around their interests - whether sporting, musical, craft-related, helping out at the local stables, joining the Scouts, or whatever appeals. As adults, we don't socialise with people the same age as we are, but with those who share our interests. If your children want friends, they are most likely to find them amongst others who share a particular interest.
Nevertheless, there is a great deal to be gained from a home educators' support group, so if you feel that you have something to offer, and would like to learn from other home educators, consider starting a group of your own.
Starting a home education support group
There are all kinds of support groups. If you're starting one, you can decide what type you want. Some people like small gatherings for the parents to chat and the children to play; this could be appropriate if you have toddlers or young children. You could meet in a home with plenty of toys, or - if there is lots of interest - somewhere like a church hall. This is probably the easiest kind of group to start if you know of other home educating (or potentially home educating) parents with young children. It can also be a good way of helping other parents to make up their minds how their children will be educated, if you make it open to all with pre-school age children.
If you have older children, you might prefer a more organised groups with craft activities, or field trips. Or you might like a group so you can study certain topics together, or do projects. If there are some activities which your children would like to do, but which are not easily available locally, this might be possible in a support group. Perhaps they would like to learn another language, or make clay pots, or start an orchestra. Nothing is impossible, but you will need to do some local research to find out what is available.
Keep the group informal to begin with
Once you have an idea of what kind of home educators' group you and your children would like, you will probably want to begin with a small informal group before becoming too ambitious. If you know other home educating families locally, just suggest a venue - perhaps your home for the first meeting. Bake something tasty, and have a couple of hours together informally.
If you don't know any other local home educating families, perhaps you could contact one of the national organisations and ask if there are others living near you. You could even advertise in the local paper, or put up posters in shops or libraries, although this will require some financial outlay. The trouble with too much advertising is that you might get hundreds families eager to join you, and it's easier to start with a small number and build up to a larger group. Do investigate possible venues, however, unless you have a large home and are willing to host your support group for the immediate future.
Start to plan!
At your first meeting, make sure you have a pen and plenty of paper! Take note of names, addresses, phone numbers and email addresses of all present, and also write down all ideas that anyone has. Make sure you have a few yourself: rather than long-term projects at first, you would be wiser to suggest activities which can be done on a single day. Sometimes there are local groups who could teach something like circus skills, or you may know someone who could organise a drama session. But wait until you have heard other suggestions before you propose your own.
Find out too what other people hope to gain from a support group, and what other activities they already take part in. You will need to discuss questions of finance: do people want to pay a weekly subscription to pay for refreshments, or take turns to bring drinks and snacks? Are they prepared to pay experts to come and teach activities, or is there sufficient expertise amongst the group to organise different events? Do they want to go for interesting field trips, which may cost significant amounts for large families, or would they prefer picnics and long hikes?
There are no right or wrong answers, but it is important to discuss these issues openly right at the beginning of your group, to avoid future embarassment.
Make sure too that you have some idea of when you want future meetings, or the group is likely to dwindle rapidly and soon cease to exist. You will probably want to meet at least once per month - perhaps twice per month - to ensure continuity. If you're an organised type of person, and can plan the first three months' worth of activities at your first meeting, you can then produce a newsletter and circulate it to all who attended the meeting, and anyone else who is interested.
On the other hand, if you're more laid back and would prefer a chance to get to know other families first, try proposing meeting informally for a few months and building up ideas slowly. It could take a year or more of monthly meetings before any structure or activities are suggested: if you're happy with this, then it's probably the easiest way to begin a group, and you will find that someone else might emerge to organise events, or suggest activities!
Possible group activities
Some groups like to have one group activity per month, in someone's home or a local meeting hall, and one 'field trip' - to a museum, or a swimming session, or to visit a farm - whatever appeals and is possible locally. For the first few meetings it is a good idea to phone everyone a day or two in advance, to remind them what you have planned and encourage them to come. You may find that you get group discounts for some activities if you book in advance and have sufficient numbers, so again it's well worthwhile knowing how many to expect.
If there is a lot of enthusiasm, you may want to have your group meet every week. This can be too much of a commitment for some families, but if you find a regular day and time, different people can decide to organise and take responsibility for events so that nobody has to attend all of them. Unless you are a born organiser who enjoys taking charge, you may want to have an informal committee to produce and distribute newsletters, organise finances (if appropriate) and remind people about bringing refreshments. This might sound rigid and structured, but without a certain amount of organisation at the beginning, your group will probably flounder.
Once your group has some kind of structure and can consistently plan two or three months in advance, make sure you advertise on local home educators' web pages, or in national (or State-wide in the USA) organisation's newsletters. If you develop a web-site (even a single page) or mailing list for a Briitsh group, please let me know so that I can add it to my local groups page. Make sure that you have access to your local regulations about home education (if any) and ways of making new members feel welcome.
If all the above sounds daunting, and if you find early on that nobody has any ideas for structure or activities, you might want to decide simply to meet informally once a month with a few families, so you can get to know each other, and so that the children can play together.
Further reading:
peer socialisation or peer pressure?
the dreaded 'S' word
home educating family blogs